Wednesday, 14 September 2016

Forget the terrible twos! It's the terrible tens!

Recently my second eldest daughter has turned ten. My once quiet and amicable girl is now a fire of feisty flames! We've had screaming, shouting, stomping, loud NO's, it's like we've gone back in time! Obviously I know hormones are raging, my eldest daughter went through a similar patch and it has blown over. But is it just me? Has anyone else noticed that ten is an age of such magnitude inside our little people, that it explodes in such a way.

There's so much pressure on our children, with school tests, secondary school places to think about, complex friendships online and offline. I'm sort of glad I was a child of the 90's when texting had just become a thing and phone calls on the landline was the norm. 

I look at the cross and upset face of my little girl and it breaks my heart. I hope this phase blows over soon and she feels a little less ragey and calm. 

Saturday, 3 September 2016

Tuesday, 9 August 2016

Fast fish pie

School holidays are always a time where purse strings are stretched. Having my five is similar to having locusts when it comes to eating anything in the house. Today I was raiding the freezer to see what I could make for dinner. I made a fish pie which went down really well and didn't cost a lot either. So here's my recipe for fast fish pie.


1 bag of Sainsburys basics frozen fish pie mix 350g £2.50
1 box of youngs fish steaks in parsley sauce 560g £3.50
2 bags of Morrisons frozen mashed potato £1 a bag £2.00

Small chunk of cheese to grate.

A large Pyrex dish to cook the pie in.


Microwave each of the youngs fish steaks as instructed on the box, squeeze contents of the bag into a large Pyrex dish. Mash with a fork

Steam the bag of frozen fish pie mix on the hob, when cooked add to the parsley fish mix in the dish and mash all together.

Grate a bit of cheese over the mixture and place in oven.

Pop frozen mash into microwave and heat according to instructions. Remove the fish mix from the oven and then spread the mash over the fish mix.

Put the mash covered pie back in the oven until mash is slightly golden and the sauce is bubbling.


This fed my five children and myself quite comfortably for only £8.00!!!! And it tasted great! I didn't add any extra seasoning as the parsley sauce was perfect. I added vegetables to serve with the pie.

I hope this quick and cheap recipe comes in handy when the pennies are tight!

Monday, 4 July 2016

Breakdown at the petrol pump

Sobbing whilst trying to fill your car up with petrol isn't a good me.

Things have started to crash down around me like a badly constructed Jenga pile of Pringles. Did I mention that I am set to graduate with a First class honours? Well to be honest it means nothing as I can't seem to get a job, in fact I seem unemployable. Is it because I'm old? Is it because I have five children? No idea but I'm jobless and useless.

Oh and the children, did I mention that my smarty pants eldest daughter got into a very nice grammar school. She loves it and she can't wait to go. However my dad has gone back on his word and refused to help with the fees, so now I have no way to pay for her and my dad has walked away....did I mention I was jobless....ah yes that's right.

So here I am sobbing into the petrol pump after working so hard for my degree to give us a better start in life for nothing to have materialised.

Yep what an absolute failure I am, I cannot bring a penny into the house yet I can fill everyday with voluntary work that I love, where is the logic in that????

Oh and it's my two eldest daughter's birthdays this week, how proud I am of them, it's just a shame their mother is absolutely clueless with a snotty nose and a petrol pump in her hand.

Saturday, 4 June 2016

Day out to Derwent dam

My husband is an aviation nut so this trip was inspired by his knowledge of the Lancaster bomber using Derwent dam as a training area for the bouncing bomb in WW2.

It was a green walled scenic drive to the Fairholmes visitor centre through the snake pass, the drive is decorated by deep leafy foliage and trees taller than imaginable for little one's eyes.

The car park is quite reasonable, £2.50 for 2 hours or £4.50 for all day. The visitor centre has toilets, lots of ducks, a little food take out cabin, and a gift shop. We came with a picnic and followed a well signed walk to Derwent dam. 

The views were impressive and there are so many places to walk and explore, we ended up having our picnic close to the shore of the reservoir.

It's a great day out steeped with historical significance. The wind started blowing as we sat eating and the sound of it whistling down the water and trees for a split second sounded just like the Lancaster flying overhead.

Thursday, 12 May 2016

Happy 6th birthday Fred!

Today Mr Freddie is 6 years old! Where has the time gone? My final baby and is such a brilliant little boy, even in the womb he had character and he is still brimming with smiles, humour, and fun.

I can't believe it's been six years since I gave birth after a very bumpy ambulance journey after a failed home birth. I wish I could have had him at home but it was still a great experience, especially with my husband and my friend Bobbie as my birth partner.

Happy birthday little man! 

Saturday, 30 April 2016


I read a post the other day that spoke about different types of grief. Recently my parents separated and moved into separate houses. At first I was grieving over how our family dynamic had changed, I tired to ignore it but in the end I had to confront it. 

Things are better now and my mum and I see each other frequently but the relationship with my dad is non existent. I see him for five minutes a week and I don't know who he is anymore. 

Things I show him are met with a vague acknowledgement, I ask him questions and he walks away, I ring his phone and he doesn't answer, he wears a ghastly Bluetooth tusk thing on his ear, there's no way he doesn't see my name flash up on his phone.

I feel like a little girl stood at the door with a cuddly toy in hand just watching as he walks away. What have done wrong? I have asked this question over and over. I watched him drift away from my mother with his many commitments and other interests, and now I think he is leaving me.

I'm grieving.

There is no one who sees it, I didn't see it until today.

I don't know him anymore, and he doesn't know me.